Mental Notes for Mommy…Don’t Take What Your Children Say Personally

I have learn many things through trial and error or heck just by
simply living my life. Something may happen and I say
“Make a Mental Note of that for next time.”

You can’t take what your children say personally.
Why do I say this?
You will never be prepared for the inevitable words

“I hate you!”
and/or
“I want a NEW Mommy or Daddy”

The first time I heard it out of my son’s mouth I just about died.  I was incredibly surprised and heartbroken.  I just didn’t expect to hear that yet anyway, he is only 5.   I have learned to not take things personally with kids. Although, sometimes it can be hard.  They say whatever comes to mind when they are mad and really don’t mean it.

I will say those words have never been said again.  Not to say they won’t even be said in the future.  I have made it a firm rule in our house that the words “I hate” are not exceptable. 
When my our oldest was upset with his father he told me “I want a NEW daddy.”  The funny part was he expected me to sympathize with him.  I DID NOT. It was already bedtime so I sent him to his room.  We said goodnight and I told him to say goodbye to his daddy because he would never see him again.  He cried and got quite upset.  I must admit I felt a little bad but I did get the point across.  I wanted him to understand what saying “I want a new daddy” really meant and how that could really hurt his dad’s feeling.  Needless to say he has never said it again.
Once again just another challenge overcome it this wild ride of parenthood.   
Well, at least for now!  

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5 Responses to Mental Notes for Mommy…Don’t Take What Your Children Say Personally

  1. Ms. Diva says:

    Just wait, teenagers can be quite hurtful!!! I just ask teham, "and all of this is my fault how?" They don't study and then get grounded for grades and I'm the bad one! Oh well!!

  2. Stacey says:

    Great post! My kids like to tell me I'm mean. I just smile, nod and agree. Because I am mean. If they liked everything I did, I wouldn't be doing my job!

  3. OOOhhhh….I am soooo not looking forward to this. I will probably want to scream and cry all at the same time!

  4. MaggieK says:

    We get that every once in a while with the four year old…not too often yet – but it can be so upsetting.

  5. Michelle says:

    I love that you told your son to say good-bye to daddy. I'm still cracking up as I write this. The title of your post made me think of something my daughter said at bedtime a few years ago. She was touching my face and then she touched hers. She said, "I like my brand new soft skin. I don't want my skin to look like yours when I grow up." I love her skin too. I didn't take the honesty of my daughter's comment personally. Okay maybe I bought the anti-aging face lotion the next time I went shopping. I teach my daughter beauty comes from the inside. She's almost seven and I think she agrees so far.

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